Having dined on spit-roast suckling pig with apple sauce in the ground floor restaurant, he or she may go upstairs to the bar for a drink only to be leered at by two bulls' heads (displayed in matching glass cases by Mr Hirst), pickled and puckering in formaldehyde.

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By the time he got to Roasted Pork Tenderloin with Dried Cranberry and Apple Stuffing and Cranberry-White Wine Reduction Sauce, Bill had bought a new meat thermometer, digital, with protruding wires and flashing lights that made it look as though he'd lifted the whole apparatus from an intensive care unit.

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